I ran across an a funny article in a local free news publication.
The Chadron Golden Age Courier titled Universal Truths.
No author given.... but thanks they are great.
I went through the list of 30 and picked out a few. Some of my favorites are in bold.
1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those time I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Map Quest really needs to start their direction on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
7. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
8. Bad decision make good stories.
9. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. (hmmm.... today)
10. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
11. I hate when I miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!) , but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
12. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
13. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
14. I wish Google Maps had an avoid "ghetto" routing option.
15. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
16. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying finish a text. (I would never text and drive....only because I would have to get out my reading glasses to text in the first place).
17. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
18. How many times is it appropriated to say "What?" before you just nod and smile, because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
19. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
20. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.